The Sweet Valley Jedi Academy
by Jaya Solo
Summary: What if the characters from Young Jedi Knights and Junior Jedi Knights were a group of snobby, conceited teenagers?


Jaina, Tenel Ka, and Tahiri sat on the lawn in front of the Sweet Valley Jedi Academy gossiping as they ate their lunch.   
  
"Hey, Tenal Ka," asked Jaina, "have you seen those new Calvin Klein Jedi robes? They're really cool, and they come in a few colors."   
  
"My dad bought me three," said Tenel Ka. "And a Tommy Hillfiger one."   
  
Jaina smirked. "Well, I have four.... of each. And a Ralph Lauren flight suit."   
  
"Ok, well, whatever. So, has Zekk asked you out on a date yet?" asked Tenel Ka.   
  
"Yeah, we went to the Courscant Multiplex. Used the Force to make the employees think we were 18, and saw an R Rated movie."   
  
"Anakin and I did that once. I think it was Terror at the Sarlacc Pit, or something. Really gory.... but cool," said Tahiri.   
  
"Oh, how come Jacen never lets us do that?" scowled Tenel Ka. "We always are stuck seeing a PG-13 one, because the Force is 'Only for good.' Blah, that's boring. But hey, he's cute, so I'll put up with it."   
  
"I can't believe you like my brother. He's so annoying, with all those stupid jokes."   
  
Just then the bell rang. "Oh, drat, I guess we'll finish this later," scowled Jaina, throwing the remains of her Whaladon (Glove of Darth Vader joke) Burger in the trash. "I've got Advanced Levitating now."   
  
"Same here," said Tahiri.   
  
"Well, I've got Advanced Lightsaber Techniques," said Tenel Ka, finishing her mashed topatos. "So, we're going to get into that R rated movie tonight, right? 10 oclock standard time?"   
  
Tahiri and Jaina nodded.   
  
Tenel Ka giggled. "Ooooh, this is gonna be fun!"   
  
Jaina, Tenel Ka, and Tahiri met at the Couruscant Multiplex at the agreed upon time. They walked up to the ticket counter.   
  
"Three tickets for Night of the Zombie Stormtroopers," said Jaina.  
  
The ticket seller frowned. "None of you three kids looks anywhere close to 18. Specially not that one," he replied, pointing to Tahiri. "I'm gonna need to see IDs from each of you."  
  
Jaina glared at the ticket seller and gave a small wave of her hand. "You don't need to see our IDs."  
  
"I don't need to see your IDs," the ticket seller replied in a zombie-like voice. "Twenty-four credits. Eight each."  
  
"You will give us our tickets for free," said Tenel Ka with a wave of her hand.  
  
"I will give you your tickets for free." The ticket seller handed each girl a ticket.  
  
Tahiri gave a mischevous grin, then waved her hand. "You will start dancing the Space Pirate Boogie right now."  
  
"I will start dancing the Space Pirate Boogie right now." And the ticket seller did just that. Giggling, the girls walked over to the refreshment stand.  
  
"I'd like a large Correlian Topato Fries," said Jaina. "You will give it to me for free."  
  
The seller did just that, and gave Tenal Ka her Ysalimiri Mellows and Tahiri her fries for free as well.  
  
Tenal Ka, Jaina, and Tahiri then walked into the movie and using the Force were able to get three people to give up the best seats in the theater. They then sat down and proceded to gossip about the day's events at school.  
  
"I can't believe my uncle won't give me perfect grades in Levitating. Gosh, it's not like I can't get the stupid rock to levitate. I just don't feel like it! But since he's my uncle, I deserve special treatment," whined Jaina.  
  
"Yeah, I mean, who cares about floating a bunch of dumb rocks?" replied Tahiri. "At least on Tatooine I didn't have to float rocks. But the fashions were terrible. Ralph Lauren only put out three different Tusken Raider outfits my last year there."  
  
"Gosh, I feel so bad for you," said Tenal Ka. "At least on Hapes, they had gazillions of shopping malls and clothes."  
  
"Same with Coruscant," replied Jaina. Just then, the girls noticed the coming attractions had started. They ended quickly, and then the movie started. They kept on chatting loudly, however.  
  
A guy in the row behind them muttered angrily, "Do you mind, I'm trying to watch?"  
  
Jaina turned to glare at him. "What's your name?" she said coldly.  
  
The guy muttered his response quickly.  
  
"And where do you work?"  
  
"The... the New Republic h-h-hired me to transport goods for them. Pays good," he replied nervously.  
  
"You know who my parents are?" replied Jaina.  
  
"And mine?" asked Tenal Ka.  
  
"I don't think I want to find out. You three are probably politician's brats," he replied irritably.  
  
"Well, then," Jaina said snootily, "if you want to keep your job, you leave us alone."  
  
And the girls continued to chat, mostly ignoring the really cheesy and horrible movie that was Night of the Zombie Stormtroopers.  
  
It was the day after the events at the multiplex, and Jaina, Tenel Ka, and Tahiri were all riding to school in Jaina's new landspeeder, which was currently the most popular model on Coruscant.  
  
Tenel Ka squealed. "Oh, I have got to get Dad to buy me one of these. My model's not nearly as fun! This has such an awesome radio, and the colors, it's all so fun!"  
  
"Did you hear my brother Anakin got tired of waiting for his sixteenth birthday, when Mom and Dad'll buy him a landspeeder? So he went and bought Lowie's skyhopper!" Jaina exclaimed.  
  
Tahiri turned to Jaina with an unhappy look. "Tionne found out.... and she thinks I'm to young to date a boy with a skyhopper. I'm almost fourteen!"  
  
"Oh, phooey. She'll let you, just cause he's from such a wonderful family and all," responded Jaina haughtily.  
  
"Hey, my family's royalty!" exclaimed Tenel Ka. "So they're better than yours!"  
  
"Mom was a Princess!"  
  
"She was adopted."  
  
"My Grandmother was a queen!"  
  
"Prove it!"  
  
"I can't!"  
  
"Cut it out," said Tahiri. "Let's talk about um..... guys?"  
  
"Yeah, guys are more important than family. So, Tenal Ka, who do you think is the cutest Jedi?"  
  
"Don't tell Jacen I said so.. but I think Kyp's pretty hot."  
  
"Nah, Ganner's cuter," responded Jaina.  
  
"I saw holos of your uncle when he was younger, and he was pretty cute," said Tahiri to Jaina.  
  
"That is scary, Tahiri!" exclaimed Jaina.  
  
"No really, he was."  
  
Tenal Ka giggled. "Say, speaking of old pics, your Dad was cute, too, Jaina."  
  
"Eeeww, this conversation is getting disturbing. Let's talk about our plans. I think I should run for student council. Tahiri's too young, you have to be 16. And you don't care about that stuff, Tenal Ka. But I think it would be cool. I could campaign for better uniforms."  
  
"Yeah, these are drab," commented Tahiri. "Let's organize a campaign!"  
  
"Hmm.... how about blue? Or green? Anything but brown."  
  
"Yeah, I saw enough brown for a lifetime on Tattooine," said Tahiri.  
  
"Great then!" said Jaina. "We can talk more at lunch," she added, parking her landspeeder.


End file.
